Privacy Controls in Yahoo! Messenger
March 21, 2007 on 3:43 pm | In Features | 61 Comments
Some of my friends hesitate to try instant messaging. The most common reasons I hear are, “IM is just for teens” and “I don’t want to be interrupted all day long.”
Well, this post is in honor of my IM-phobic friends. I assure them that I love IM (and that I long ago stopped checking the age 13-19 box), and that Yahoo! Messenger’s handy stealth settings and other privacy controls allow them to control who they talk to and when.
The most extreme form of privacy in Yahoo! Messenger is making yourself “invisible.” You can do this right when you sign in by clicking the “Sign in as Invisible” box. Or you can change your status to “Invisible to Everyone” after you’re online. This immediately changes your appearance to “offline” in other friends’ contact lists, so they think you’re unavailable. Your contact list will also change to italics so you have a visual reminder of your invisible status.
Friends can still IM you when you’re invisible, but you can safely ignore the messages without feeling guilty. You can also IM anyone when you’re invisible, but keep in mind this will blow your cover! Whenever I do this, I inevitably get the reply, “Why are you hiding from me?”
Even when you are in invisible mode, you can still appear available to select friends. For example, when I sign on from home in the evening, I don’t want to be available to my coworkers (shocking, right?
). So I sign in as invisible and then set my status as available to only the Friends group in my contact list. Friends see me online but my colleagues don’t. To do that, I right-click the group name, choose “Stealth Settings” and select “Appear Online to Selected Contacts.” You can use this same technique to appear online to individual contacts as well. The friends you chose to be online for will also see you as available on their lists, and their names on yours will no longer be in italics.
If you have contacts that you always want to appear offline to, just right-click on a contact (or group), choose “Stealth Settings, then select “Appear Permanently Offline.” This setting is preserved even when you sign off and sign back in.
Status messages are another way to let friends know when you’re busy and don’t want to be disturbed. You can create a custom status message (“Pulling my hair out” or “Don’t bug me!”) and choose the “Busy” icon to display with it. This lets you still be online but tells friends that you’d rather not be contacted and why. Of course friends don’t always obey your status wishes, but there’s only so much advice I can give.
And last, if an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend just won’t leave you alone, there’s always the “Ignore” button in the IM window, which will prevent further messages from being delivered. If the breakup doesn’t stick and you want the person back in your (IM) life, you can always take the person off your Ignore list (Messenger menu > Preferences > Ignore List). The Ignore list preference also has a setting that will block IMs from anyone who is not on your Messenger list.
So to all my IM-phobic friends, I hope the above solutions will entice you to join the wonderful world of IM. See you online!
Sarah Bacon
Product Manager
I don’t like stealth settings option.
Comment by Giovanna — March 21, 2007 #
No needs privacy control in Yahoo!Messenger.
Comment by Bronach Seana — March 21, 2007 #
nice article.
Comment by YM secrets — March 22, 2007 #
pretty usless since it very easy to check if someone is invisable or if there trully offline lol until that fixed yahoo should just remove this feature lol
Comment by Ian — March 22, 2007 #
Useless! I get around 20 MASS messages a day like “yahoo is closing”, “yahoo is not free anymore”, “click here to download a virus”
Can you please disable masss messaging? I can be invisible or have a busy status, but i still get these.
Mass messages should be marked with a star or something and an option to disable them would be great. I don’t want to disable sending them, I just want not to receive them.
It’s great that the Mac version doesn’t have mass messages, but i still receive way to many from my Windows friends.
Please find a way to fix this. Thanks
Oh yeah. . and what about a Mac update?
Comment by Lucky — March 22, 2007 #
I like the detailed stealth settings in Yahoo!
Comment by user — March 22, 2007 #
Whats the status of a Mac update? It has been in beta mode for ever.
Comment by Alex Rodriguez — March 22, 2007 #
Privacy in Yahoo! Messenger? How does this relate to the 3 month old problem if of me seeing many other people’s movements online and offline that I have never seen before, their privacy has been breached.
I can only assume that my movements appear on somebody elses list.
Comment by Sean — March 22, 2007 #
i like stealth settings a lot, but i wish messenger didn’t default to giving your entire first and last name to your contact, when adding a contact.
no other im program does that.
thanks
Comment by jon — March 22, 2007 #
Hi Jon,
Have you tried editing your contact details? Go to the “Messenger” menu and choose “My Contact Details” (Alt +m + d). If you have something in the first or last name field, just remove it (you can also put in a nickname for yourself if you prefer). This should result in you showing up with just your Yahoo! ID or nickname when someone adds you to their list.
Here’s a thread on Yahoo! Answers that is helpful:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20060801164901AAq1Pzd
Sarah Bacon
Comment by Administrator — March 22, 2007 #
I have the opposite problem. I’m lucky if i get one stat view a day on my 360 page. I should be careful what i ask for but right now i wish i had your problem. Ok so i’m trying to advertise my Avon business online and it just seems like everybody runs away. Am i too pushy or just not going to the right places? I’m still new to all this.
Comment by DebbieK — March 22, 2007 #
Stealth settings and invisibility status in general offer only a false sense of privacy. It’s a shame too because these features have potential and would be great features if they couldn’t be circumvented so easily.
Comment by Adam [Torseq Technologies] — March 22, 2007 #
who needs stealth…ya can’t get into the room any more or it takes 10 tries. beside alot of my freinds no longer use yahoo messanger any moe… it’s a shame…that yahoo,lt go to bots….
Comment by den — March 22, 2007 #
I think MSN’s messenger is best.Because there wink effect is great.Speacialy ‘bow and pig’,
Comment by Thomjee — March 23, 2007 #
Who needs stealth when the Mac version hasn’t been updated in what seems like years?
Comment by derek jeter — March 23, 2007 #
Hey,
How about fixing yahoo Chat Rooms? They’re very slow in entering them and changing room!!
Thanks
Comment by Jiegen — March 23, 2007 #
ya, Yahoo! should concentrate on rebuilding the Chatrooms from scratch, it has really become a mess.. its so slow
Comment by Arun — March 24, 2007 #
thanks Sarah. i tried editing my contact details like you suggested. each attempt i made resulted in an error: “The last Address Book operation did not succeed due to a server error. (Error Code: -40031)”.
i don’t think this is the first time i’ve seen this error. i believe the same thing has happened when i’ve tried to edit my contact details in the past, via Messenger. currently, i’m running Yahoo Messenger 8.1.0.239 on Windows XP Media Center Edition 2005.
i’ll check the Y! Answers thread and/or try again later. thanks again.
Comment by jon — March 24, 2007 #
i tried again a few hours later and still got the “error code -40031.”
Comment by jon — March 24, 2007 #
i received the same error today. safe to say this is a bug on Yahoo’s end.
Comment by jon — March 25, 2007 #
well its fact kids wont get in a chat room o wait no one can rotflmao
Comment by Yep — March 26, 2007 #
Great! awsome now can we have some privacy controls for spam? did you not see the huge responce over the spam issue? over 340 comments and you are just going to ignore this? lol seriously your chat service is going downhill do you not realise this i don’t mean to apear rude but can you please open a topic for spam the real issues yahoo users face.
Comment by Karl — March 26, 2007 #
And me too.Error code-40031
Comment by Putto — March 27, 2007 #
I started using Yahelite again and it rolls through rooms faster than anything I have tried using. And the ignore keeps them ignored and Yahoo Lagg Killer works flawlessly with it too. BTW. it didn’t cost me a cent!
Comment by polar — April 1, 2007 #
I’m curious about the ignore settings.
If I place someone in my ignore list, do I get taken off of their friend list as well? And if not, will that person still be able to see me if I’m online or not?
Comment by Lina — April 19, 2007 #
Hi Lina – When you ignore a contact, you always appear offline to the contact. They cannot view your status or send you an IM. Here’s a help page with some more information:
http://help.yahoo.com/l/us/yahoo/messenger/messenger8/messenger/messenger-27.html
Thanks,
Sarah Bacon
Comment by Administrator — April 20, 2007 #
but people can find me online even if i am invisible mode by using Buddyspy software……:-(
i hope you can rectify that
Comment by rahul — June 15, 2007 #
If I ignore or even deleted a contact, would they be able to tell that they are being ignored/deleted?
Comment by Dog Clothing — September 20, 2007 #
Hi Dog Clothing,
If you ignore a contact when they IM you, they are not notified. Same with if you delete someone from your list – they are not notified in any way. Keep in mind that if you are on their list, you’ll remain there. Removing someone from your list does not in turn remove you from theirs.
The only time when someone gets notified is if you decline an Add Friend request. You can Ignore a request (e.g. just cancel or close out the Add request) but if you actually decline, the requestor is notified that you declined.
Sarah Bacon
Comment by Administrator — September 20, 2007 #
IMPORTANT!!
Hi! What I’d like to know is a little unorthoox, but I was wondering if there’s any way to find out whether or not you’re on someone else’s ignore list. This contact is not in my address book.
Thank you!
Comment by Helen — October 20, 2007 #
i want to know if some of my friend ignored me from his list,so how i could know about tht
Comment by mandeep — October 25, 2007 #
Hi Helen and Mandeep,
Sorry – there is no way to tell if someone has you on their ignore list (that would defeat the whole point of privacy, right?). If you send an IM to someone and you are on their ignore list, they would never see the IM and you would not be notified that it never went through.
Sarah Bacon
Comment by Administrator — October 25, 2007 #
for error code -40031
Solution: right click contact > contact details > removing email ID of that buddy (do not click X near messenger ID) > press on save & close.
Note: for me, it get resolved for few contacts:), for others it didn’t work
.
Comment by Champ — October 26, 2007 #
If my stealth settings are set for “permanently offline” to a contact or they are on your ignore list, are they able to see when you sign out of yahoo and onto your mobile device? It seems that I get messaged from contacts that I have set to one of these settings the instant I go mobile.
Comment by Dawn — December 10, 2007 #
I’m not so sure if the ability to find out if someone has you on their ignore list defeats the object of privacy, in fact, i think it clarifies it. If you are on someone’s ignore list, at least then you know that your messages aren’t getting through to them, and they have specifically done that for a reason, as opposed to they might not be logging on for a long time, etc.
At the end of the day, if ignore lists are available, it doesn’t mean that you can change them, and it doesn’t mean that you can contact someone that has ignored you, so the privacy right is still maintained, it just makes things clearer.
Comment by Andy — December 28, 2007 #
How do you tell if someone who’s invisible on the im read your messages?.Well theres this one friend who’s always invisible and sometimes i go to my message archive and i see the messages i left. Then sometimes they don’t show. When they don’t show anymore dose that mean they got them and read them? Because I would’nt know if they logged in and read them. I’d really like to know. Thank you
Comment by freakydeakay — March 9, 2008 #
Something very weird happened. I put someone on my ignore list, but, instead of seeing me offline all the time, he saw my status. He told me he used some secret option that yahoo has and could see my status. Could that really have happened?… I didn’t make any mistake. He was surely on my ignore list:(
Comment by Emma — May 18, 2008 #
IT DOESN’T WORK
for error code -40031
Solution: right click contact > contact details > removing email ID of that buddy (do not click X near messenger ID) > press on save & close.
Note: for me, it get resolved for few contacts:), for others it didn’t work.
Comment by Champ — October 26, 2007 #
—————-
Hi there, what do i have to do if i dun have any email ID for the contact ( i just have messenger ID)? Plz help me out. Thanks for ur reply.
Comment by Titi — June 24, 2008 #
The ignore list does not always work. I have this stalker who I never added to my list. Everytime I log on he messages me and I have to click ignore, only to have him be able to see me the next time I log on. I have gone to my preferences…then to ignore list…only to find his user name is no longer there. Why does he go off my list everytime I log out and how can I change this?
Comment by deborah — June 26, 2008 #
Is anybody having problems with “.Live” users and massive “add friend” spamming? I keep getting add requests from randomized .live and hotmail users despite having set that I don’t want any contact from any user that isn’t in my friend’s list.
Is there an update that can fix this? It is absolutely annoying
Comment by Daryl — July 3, 2008 #
ok how about this…
is it possible to put a person in your ignore list without deleting this person? i still need him to appear on my messenger list, but i dont ever wanna recieve any of his messages. hahahah (for personal reasons… but it looks like you’re getting it.)
Comment by selective IMphobia — July 17, 2008 #
Dear selective IMphobia,
Yes, there is. Go to the Messenger menu, select Preferences and then choose Ignore List. You can manually enter someone into this list from there.
Sarah Bacon
Comment by Administrator — July 17, 2008 #
Regarding the -40031 error, I also had the same problem.
What I did was I uninstall my Yahoo! Messenger and installed a new one. It fixed the error. ^^x
Comment by sherma — August 23, 2008 #
i had the same error. i did not need to reinstall, I just signed out and back in again and then i could save the new contact info i was trying to enter before.
Comment by reya — August 23, 2008 #
same error when i change just one of my contact but others i can change but the other one cant. the last last adress book operation did not succeed due to a server error. (code 40031)
Comment by jane — August 25, 2008 #
How do i unistall yahoo messenger…??there’s no option in the programs that says uninstall??
Comment by Juz — August 27, 2008 #
And i’m also having a error code 40031 in changing my friend’s yahoo id into their real name…how do i really fix it…?i’ve done everything xcept uninstall Yahoo messenger…becoz i cudn’t find the unistall button..
Comment by Juz — August 27, 2008 #
Hi,
Why are my messages not readable in chat rooms? How can I make my messages readable or visible in chat rooms?
Comment by paddle — August 31, 2008 #
About the 40031-error:
Quit the program, then delete the contents of the “Cache”-folder:
c:/program files/Yahoo/Messenger/Cache
(Or D:/ or wherever you installed it.)
Now when you restart the program it will get the contents from the Yahoo-server, and it will be fine again. If it happens again, just repeat the step above.
Comment by Christian — August 31, 2008 #
the solution works!!
well, it works for me!
thanks!!
Comment by Immortall — September 1, 2008 #
Hi!
I have one question
How do i find out if someone has me on their ignore list?
Besides the fact that i cannot see them online, i mean that can also be stealth settings not ignore.
Help?
Comment by Ana — September 19, 2008 #
@Ana – It’s not possible to know if you’re on someone’s ignore list, nor is it possible to know if they have set themself to appear invisible to you.
Sarah Bacon
Comment by Administrator — September 19, 2008 #
i have the same contact details error, but it says that its error code (-7). idk if its bc i have msgr 9 or what but it kinda pisses me off because im trying to SMS message my friends. please help…
Comment by josh — December 5, 2008 #
can i check if someone has me on their ignore list ?
please help ….
Comment by Ann — January 15, 2009 #
Dear selective IMphobia,
Yes, there is. Go to the Messenger menu, select Preferences and then choose Ignore List. You can manually enter someone into this list from there.
Sarah Bacon
That tells you that you have to remove somebody from your messeger list to add them to your ignore list.
Comment by Billy2k — February 1, 2009 #
Hy! I have a question…If someone deletes my YM ID from his list and he is invisible, I can see if is online ?
Comment by Chriss — February 7, 2009 #
If someone deleted me from their YM list and wanted to add me again. Will I have to accept the invitation or will I be automatically added since he is still in my YM list. Please Help.
Comment by Ilene — February 12, 2009 #
what does error code -40031 actually mean. i dont wanna know how to fix i wanna definition so please WHAT IS ERROR CODE -40031?
Comment by alice — March 15, 2009 #
Why I can not modify the name of the persons in messenger list? All the time I have this error: the last address book operation did not succeed due to a server error (Error code: -40402)
Best regards,
Bogdan
Comment by Bogdan Motoc — March 19, 2009 #
I encountered the same error ( Error code:40402) Is there anybody there who got the solution?
Comment by indian — April 2, 2009 #
i try to edit one of my friends contact details and i get a message saying–”the last address book operation did not suceed due to a server error(Error Code: -40402) it will ONLY do this on ONE of my friends but it will let me edit details on every other friend….what do i do to fix this..i need help:)!
Comment by kelly — April 5, 2009 #